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Losing track of the days in the face of mounting existential dread? You’re not alone––everyone is a little dazed and crazed these days. Luckily, the 2023 Pearls Before Swine “Rainbows-And-Unicorns-All-Will-Be-Better-This-Year-Calendar” will help you white-knuckle your way into positivity. I mean, it can’t get worse…right?! With the trademark twisted humor and outlandish puns that have made Pearls Before Swine one of the funniest comic strips being published today, each page of this daily calendar features a full-color Pearls Before Swine comic strip with your favorite characters like Rat, Pig, Goat, or the Crocs.Features include:6" x 5.125" page sizeEasel backer for desk or tabletop displayPrinted on FSC certified paper with soy-based inkFull-color tear-off pagesBack of pages are blank for notes or shopping listsDay/Date reference on each page365 daily pagesOfficial major world holidays and observationsFeatures a new comic each day that will make you laugh no matter how terrible the morning news is
Prepare to get swept up in a tidal wave of hilarity, sarcasm, and atrocious puns courtesy of award-winning Pearls Before Swine cartoonist Stephan Pastis.For the past 20 years, Pearls Before Swine has been one of the most popular and consistently hilarious comic strip in newspapers. This treasury packs in 18 months' worth of daily comic strips from 2018-2019, including an introduction, essay, and special commentary by the author.
"Robb Armstrong populates his comic strip with great, well-drawn characters . . . and that's the whole thing." — Charles Schulz, creator of Peanuts
A comprehensive treasury of JumpStart, celebrating 30 years of one of the most beloved African-American family comic strips in history.
In the newest Pearls Before Swine treasury, the Hollywood dreams of cartoonist Stephan Pastis meet with hilarious—and disastrous—results!
Pearls Before Swine is one of the most popular comic strips of the past two decades, and this treasury packs in 18 months worth of daily comic strips including special commentary by author Stephan Pastis, winner of the 2018 Reuben Award for Cartoonist of the Year. The book also includes an essay about his foray into the world of film directing.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR!
In true Pearls Before Swine tradition, this treasury is full of Stephan Pastis’s cynical humor, sharp wit, and clever commentary. Always together—and sometimes with their fellow funny-page characters—the regular Pearls clan weighs in on everything from modern technology to current events to human nature. All the members of the skewed gang are here as Zebra engages in a never-ending war of neighborly hate with the Crocs. As always, Goat offers a voice of reason amid the ongoing chaos that Pastis creates, either from behind the pen or as a character within the strip itself.Includes all cartoons from the collections I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream Because Puns Suck and Floundering Fathers.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR! We the people, in order to form a Pig-ful union, establish ruckus, ensure personal futility, provide for the Zeeba defense, promote the general pun-fare, and endure depressing proclivities of Rat and his vulgarity, do ordain and establish this . . . collection of Pearls Before Swine comics! All of your favorite misanthropic, moronic, pretentious, predatory, political characters are back—plus the Pearls gang! These all-new strips would make our founding fathers . . . well, maybe it’s a good thing they’re not around to see Goat get a Tinder account, Rat campaign as an unabashedly selfish demagogue, or Stephan inflict pun after pun on his unfortunate readers. Floundering Fathers is guaranteed to make you laugh. Or cry. Or roll over in your grave.
The Get Fuzzy team is back in action, and they’re jumping in with all feet.
Our tough-as-nails crew has been assembled. Bucky Katt has a plan to take out the ferrets next door, and it will require all of his powers of disguise and stealth to get the job done. Satchel Pooch is going on the offense and channeling his inner assault-broccoli to defeat the vegetables before they defeat him. And Rob, the unofficial peacekeeper, is left to clean up the aftermath before the whole thing becomes an international incident. Packed with intrigue, covert aggression, and domestic warfare, Catabunga! is an all-out battle of wit and words that’s not to be missed.
PUNS! We know it’s coming. The telltale signs are all there: the oddly specific setup, the unusual word choice, and, just visible out of the corner of our eye, the final panel of Stephan sitting at his desk awaiting the chastisement of one of his characters. Somehow the pun still manages to elicit a groan larger than we expected. Fortunately for us—and for Stephan’s job security—there are more than just puns in I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream Because Puns Suck. The entire Pearls Before Swine crew returns in some of the strip’s most raucous cartoons yet. Rat tries his hand at public service as a judge and presidential candidate (he’s accepting tips), Goat has a nasty run-in with Internet trolls (maybe it’s time to get off social media), and Pig is dismayed to learn that there is no European city of “Hamsterdam” (much less a dam that holds back a river of hamsters). And like always, the Zebras can congratulate each other on a safe day and hope for a Croc-less tomorrow—in other words, the preys praise and pray.
Move over! Pearls Before Swine is back and badder than ever in the new treasury collection Pearls Hogs the Road. The Pearls gang returns with characteristically misanthropic humor (but with more leather): no self-aggrandizing is too flagrant for Rat, no subject is too erudite for Goat, and no sensory input is too basic for Pig. All topics are fair game for Stephan Pastis and his brass-knuckle punch lines. Comic strip censors, apathetic baristas, and IRS employees are all strongly advised to laugh or get out of the way.Pearls Hogs the Road also features three comic strips illustrated by the legendary Bill Watterson of Calvin and Hobbes, who ended a 19-year hiatus from the comics page to collaborate with Pastis.
An author-annotated Pearls Before Swine treasury featuring cartoons from Larry in Wonderland and Because Sometimes You Just Have to Draw a Cover with Your Left Hand.
From fire-breathing jugglers to sword-swallowing illusionists, this treasury showcases all strips from Larry in Wonderland and Because Sometimes You Just Gotta Draw a Cover with Your Left Hand, along with Pastis's original commentary, which provides insight into what Pastis was thinking at the time random strips were conceived, and also fan reactions.
Tackling topics ranging from current events and modern technology to human and croc nature, Pearls Freaks the #*%# Out offers up a sideshow of feisty characters, including arrogant, self-centered, and totally hilarious Rat, who leads his four-legged collection of freakish friends through a carnival of misadventure. Joining the circuslike cavalcade are Pig, the slow but good-hearted conscience of the strip; Goat, the voice of reason that often goes unheard; Zebra, the activist; and those eternally inept carnivorous Crocs, who we learn happen to taste a lot like chicken. Pastis's cynical humor and sharp wit imbue this entertaining vaudevillian collection.
Gather ‘round the smartphone, kids! Stephan and the Pearls gang are back with a whole album's-worth of jokes, jabs, and cringe-worthy puns.
Even Rat cracks a smile in this fifth Pearls Before Swine collection tailored for middle-grade readers. Witty, wacky, and occasionally wise, Suit Your Selfie is more kid-friendly fun from the New York Times best-selling author of Timmy Failure.
From Stephan Pastis, the New York Times best-selling author of Timmy Failure, comes the always hilarious cast of Pearls Before Swine in this fourth special collection for kids.Sure, crocs can fly . . . just not in the way you might expect. This spectacular feat usually involves an impenetrable wall, zip lines, gravity, and an appetizing zebra on the other side. In this collection of cartoons specially chosen for kids, the gang from Pearls Before Swine gets into adventures you have to see to believe. Join Rat and Pig—the brains and the pawn—as they attempt the first 3D comic; see what happens when the luckless crocs adopt two Oreos (penguins); and roll your eyes with Goat as he tries desperately to keep his sanity in the midst of these antics. Warning: Flying (Falling) Crocs Ahead!